I’ve been feeling the need to start a new blog lately just to chat about my life. The funny thing is, I already have more than enough blogs, but none of them feel like they truly belong to just me and to telling my own story.
The very first blog I started is my three-year-old daughter’s blog, “ The Monster in Pink and the Plum Princess.” I write the blog from my daughter’s point of view for family and friends to keep up with what’s happening in our world. It started out as a bit of a stress reliever and has worked well in serving that purpose – except for the times when I really need to get something off my chest, which I can’t always do from Devin’s point of view.
Then I started a blog called “Fighting the Darkness, My Secret Battle with Depression.” You can probably tell what this blog is all about. I wanted a space to share my struggles and triumphs with depression in order to encourage others suffering from the same illness. It’s my place to connect with others that understand me. It’s a place where we are united – where we are no longer alone with our illness. It’s an important space to me that I don’t want to belittle with some of my more trite ramblings.
Next I started a stamping and scrapbooking blog – “Stamping with Jamie, Adventures in Stamping and Scrapbooking”. I wanted a place to share my layouts, my inspirations and things that I’ve learned along the way.
But my life is so much more than just those three areas and needs one spot for me to share. For example, I’m currently training to do my first Sprint Triathlon in August and training and eating right are taking up a big part of my life. It’s really providing me with a feeling of purpose, which I really enjoy having.
I’ve been a stay-at-home mom since my oldest daughter was born in March 2004 and constantly wrestle with my self-worth. I know that being a mother is an important job, so important that I decided before having kids that I would stay at home full time, but I really miss feeling like a “productive” member of working society.
I feel as though my hard-earned degree is simply a piece of useless paper filed away on my bookshelf while my once active brain slowly atrophies with each Doodlebop song I sing. And yet I read every parenting book I can get my hands on, attend a weekly class on being a good homemaker and give my all to my family with the hope that it is good enough.
In a nutshell, I struggle daily with what it means to be a good mother and wife and with how to balance that part of my life with my other wants and needs, which is becoming more vague and less defined with each passing day.
With all that said, this is my space to share my daily triumphs and tribulations in every area of my life. I realize that it probably won’t be pretty, but that’s all part of discovering me.